Cowell is set to be the butt of many jokes − from lovechilds to high trouser waistlines – but he is taking them in good spirit
"I honestly thought this is the worst idea I have ever heard," admitted Sean Foley when he first heard of the proposal for an X Factor musical in the West End of London. "It just sounded like a terrible cash-in thing." The comment prompted a quick riposte from Simon Cowell, the man behind the hit TV show (and producer of the spin-off musical). "We've never done that," he quipped.
Clearly Foley changed his mind, as he will direct I Can't Sing! The X Factor Musical, which opens at the London Palladium next spring.
The show is the brainchild of Harry Hill and is being backed by Cowell, who on Monday night joined cast members and production crew to give the first taste of what audiences can expect.
Cowell, who had a black Rolls Royce parked outside with the passenger door open, said he had let the creative team get on with it, and that he did not interfere. "I get it in the neck throughout − and it's constantly evolving this story − and I don't care."
The cast performed three songs including Please Simon, where a string of desperates seek the impresario's approval. "Please don't force me back on the game," one shouts. "My mum's an alcoholic and my dad's a psycho," says another, while a third shouts: "I fear I might kill again."
There were also songs from the two main contestants − a Bono wannabe plumber/environmental warrior played by Holby City's Alan Morrissey, and Chenice, played by Cynthia Erivo, who thinks she has a voice that sounds like a cat strangled on a ball of string but clearly does not.
Hill said his television show TV Burp had come to an end and he was watching X Factor with a drink, as normal − "I think Eoghan Quigg had just got through to the semi-finals" − when he had the idea. He contacted ITV boss Peter Fincham, who approached Cowell, who "was broadly up for it".
The idea was formally pitched and Cowell went to a workshop where he ordered his PA to find a seat close to an exit. "I said if the songs are crap, I'm out. And I stayed."
Like TV Burp, it will mercilessly take the mickey, but not in a cruel way, said Hill. Steve Brown, who has written the music and lyrics, said: "It would be a bit self defeating to just send up something you absolutely loathe. We are highlighting some of the more ridiculous aspects of it but it would be a really depressing brief for us if all the time we were grinding our teeth thinking I hate this. It is done with affection."
Cowell was asked if anything was off-limits like Dannii Minogue or babies. "Dannii? Dannii?" joked Cowell of his one-time fellow judge and a woman he had an affair with. "I didn't want to do a musical that we took too seriously. The X Factor is a serious show but it's also a fun show and I like Harry's sense of observation. The big thing for me were the songs, were the songs going to be good or not."
Cowell was the butt of many jokes − mostly about lovechilds and yachts − at the press launch at Rada Studios but he took them in good spirit, even answering questions about his absurdly high trouser waistline. "They are not that high any more," he said. "They used to be." Although he was at a loss to say why.
The show's producers said the answer would be revealed in the show.
Although Cowell is keeping out of the creative side, he has had a say in the casting and said yes to the good-looking 40-year-old hired to portray him − the former EastEnders bad boy Nigel Harman. Harman last year won an Olivier for his show-stealing portrayal of Lord Farquaad in Shrek the Musical and will, later this year, be seen as a trouble-making valet in the fourth series of Downton Abbey.
The launch came two days after X Factor returned for its 10th season on ITV. The show gained 500,000 more viewers than last year's debut, although it is still some way off the peaks of previous years.
Every new musical is a big financial gamble and producers will have in mind the last musical based on a TV talent show − Jennifer Saunders' Viva Forever!, the Spice Girls musical which this year garnered awful reviews and closed early.
Foley, who directed and starred in The Play What I Wrote and directed The Ladykillers in the West End last year, said he hoped audiences would be won over. "It's funny. I get involved with funny shows but this is really funny."